The Willy Man… IS really 10 ten inches long!!
Posted by Foodie on July 29, 2008
We were huffing and puffing, drawn out from the long exhaustive walk at Pashupatinath when we finally decided to rest our weary feet at a small clearing in the massive open air temple of Kathmandu. “There’s no such thing as the willy man lah” quipped Damien. “Are you sure he’s not just a myth or rumour conjured by people to attract visitors?”
“I think ….more like some figment of her imagination. An obsession and quest to find the man with the biggest dick on earth like they are trying to find the bigfoot in the Yosemite!” James roars with laughter.
I’m talking about the willy man who dwells in the Pashupatinath. I was surfing the internet prior to our Tibet cum Nepal trip when I happened upon a list of must see or dos in Nepal which included a most interesting subject; the ‘Willy Man’! This man they decided to nickname Willy was apparently so well endowed, that he was one of the main attractions of the temple. With an extremely long ‘piece of equipment’ he could also supposedly lift and swing huge rocks with it. How I had no idea but I knew we had to make a stop for him. This I had to see for myself. My curiosity was instantly aroused but could you blame me? It wasn’t because I was sexually frustrated or anything mind you. I just found this darn interesting! I was over 21 years of age at that time and thus above the age limit to be exposed to such things. Good old Nepal, this could never happen in Malaysia (bolehland), here such acts would be deemed as indecent exposure and the sadhu’s ass would already have been dragged to jail, whipped AND slapped with several charges.
Meanwhile, the guys feigned disinterest but I could judge from their body language, that they were nervous as hell about meeting this willy man I’d talked about so incessantly, as much if not more than me! We all know how men have this issue with size and they compare it too. Why else would they have something so silly as a ‘Pissing competition’? In fact, let’s be fair, this obsession with size involves both sexes. However, thankfully for women, our equipment is not a means to an end. So size matters but not really that much! 😉
“You say he can lift huge rocks with his ‘thing’? Sure or not? If he can lift rocks, my brother here can do a 16th beat on the drums! How long is it really?!” Damien does a crude imitation of himself playing drums with his ‘yunnowhat’. I screw up my face but laugh hysterically at how silly he looks, trying to swing his imaginary piece of equipment all over the place whilst thrusting his hips forwards and backwards. He looks like a baboon on heat. 😛 (sorry Damien but you did)
“Somewhere in this temple, he lurks….I’m sure” and just then out of nowhere, as if he had heard us, this exceedingly lean, scruffy looking sadhu appeared out of nowhere. He was half naked with only an orange cloth covering his lower half of body. He had long dirty unruly hair in a bundle and they are tangled in a mass of what seems like a botched up job of dreadlocks. Some bits looked like it had been soldered because they seemed to resemble a chunk of hair that had stuck together permanently, taking form.
The two guys struggled with their cameras and lenses whilst I negotiate with the Willy Man. We knew he was the man because his sign language was crystal clear. First, he pointed to a rock the size of a melon and then he pointed to his groin. The guys jumped up and down screaming “IT’S THE WILLY MAN! IT’S THE WILLY MAN!” I swear at this point, the willy man gives them both a shifty look.
“300 rupees (if my memory serves me right). You take picture. Me this (points to groin again) go up (points up to the sky) big rock(points to the rock)!” says the Willy Man. I attempted to bargain but the guys yelled, “PAY THE MAN WHAT HE WANTS LA.QUICK! ” With slightly unsteady hands I pay him the money.The guys try to kick the rock and it doesn’t budge much. “Wah piang eh, this one not fake! Damn heavy man!” The Willy Man then proceeded to lift the cloth and revealed LO AND BEHOLD a ten inch limp dick! I stole a quick glance at the boys and saw their jaws had dropped almost to the ground at this point! With a deft hand, the Willy Man placed his ‘equipment’ across the cloth that hung the rock and lifted the rock by standing up whilst holding on to the end of his ‘equipment’. Click Click Click our cameras went. We were like mad paparazzis focused only on this man’s groin region. The Willy Man even swung the rock a bit to show off and I swear I could sense envy from the boys as their jaws dropped even further. Before we knew it, Willy Man lowered the rock and cloth and the show was over! We were in awe. All three of us. Out of respect, we walked away in silence and waited until we were a fair distance away before we broke out in peals of laughter that lasted I think a good 5 -10 minutes! Man, the Willy Man Rules the Day!!!