The Dandelions

.. the mutual admiration and bashing society.

Posts Tagged ‘chocolate’

Chocolate, sex and orgasm

Posted by jingoisticbuthornydesperado on August 3, 2008

Sex is too much of a taboo and I would like to demystify sex. I am not just talking about any sex, I am also going to talk about kinky sex with the help of chocolate…… Hah, no I am not a practical sex guru, I would probably consider myself as an amateur kinky sex theorist.

Chocolate is one of my favourite desserts, especially Belgian chocolate. There are three commercial houses being Leonidas, Neuhaus and Godiva. Leonidas is the most affordable, I have tasted it and I like it. However, Neuhaus and Godiva are supposedly a league above Leonidas, but so is the price being a league above. Neuhaus is recommended for people who like quite a fruity flavour. Godiva has less of a fruity mix, and the chocolate has just the perfect mixture (in my opinion) of chocolate taste with (coffee or nutty). Whereas masturbation-induced orgasm or lousy sex last for less than 5 to 10 minutes, the pleasure from indulging in Belgian chocolate can be more than 5-10 minutes, and yes I would rather forsake lousy 5-10 minutes sex and 5 minutes masturbation for Godiva chocolate. Be forewarned, 250 grams of Godiva chocolate is at a whooping RM65!

So how does one make full use of an expensive chocolate? This requires a loving (or lustful) couple of course! And perfect for Valentine’s day! First place the chocolate nuggets at the appropriate body parts (preferably without the clothes, and use your imagination). How do you want to pick up the chocolate nugget is in the realm of your fantasy. I personally think the mouth and the tongue are underused organs or limbs…… Whoever uses the teeth should be banned from sexual intercourse! A little bit of whipped cream along the ‘treasure trail’ might help, usually whip cream isn’t expensive, you can get a bottle of spray-on whipped cream for maybe RM6 I think.

For those who are more health conscious, a few strawberries on top of the whipped cream is a possible alternative. One of course can play with and move the whipped cream around by blowing gently and lovingly…… Yes, blowing gently can be very sensual (no, I am not talking about 69 or oral sex when I talk about blowing).

Yes this is hedonism, is hedonism bad? No. Why the hell does mother nature give us sensual pleasure if we don’t indulge in it. And I personally despise unrealistic and unreasonable social taboo and mind-numbingly stupid and inhibitive social norms. You say norm? I say bollocks. We are not hurting anyone are we? Sex to me can be viewed as an art form. It is beautiful, artistic and healthy. It releases endorphin into your body which makes you happy. And a good sex is as good as and probably better than 45 minutes of jogging session. Yup, good sex burn a lot of calories. Good sex with chocolate is heavenly. Don’t forget, coco is full with antioxidants that slows aging. You enjoy it and it is not painful like botox injection.

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